5 Things I Would Tell My Ex

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1. Would You Come Back to Me? 

This is a rhetorical question, of course. Do not answer that, or ask that. A lot of people base the validity of their feelings on missing someone. “I miss him so much, that means I love him/her!” Not always. Most times, it might mean that time or distance or both separated you both and your mind and heart are catching up to each other. You are suddenly aware that you are moving forward. Let your heart and mind do that.

2. You are No Longer Here 

Well, yes. A break happened between you two. Something important happened, whether good or bad, that changed the course of things. One thing led to another that led to a series of other things or one big thing that led to this break. In order to deal with the emotions or have them heal in the best way that they can, you may have to leave. You may have to stop being friends. You may have to leave the country (kidding!) You may need that person to be out of your presence for an extended period of time to make sense of things again.

3. Sometimes I’m Near You, But You Seem to Disappear 

Ah, the part where your mind is playing tricks on you. Moving on, making that transition from not single to single can be painful. Like you are weaning yourself off a drug or something. Sleepless nights, enough tears to fill a room, everything is a blur…until it is not. Then one day, the pain subsides. Everything is less gray. It is still there but you learn how to deal with it. Some people become numb to the world, others give the world a second chance.

4. I Tried to Make You Understand

Breaks are seldom mutual. Someone decided to move on to greener pastures and that other someone is left with a mess to fix. Relationships and friendships can get super complicated so both parties can play both roles at any time. Here is where compromise may not be the best thing: begging, doing things you would not do, sending multiple olive branches and white flags in case the other party did not get the first ten…the list can be embarrassingly endless. Note to the wise: when someone tells you or shows you how they feel, believe them.

5. Thank You 

This may be the most important thing to say. You took off your cool and met that person halfway, but that was not enough. But you know what, that is not a bad thing. No, not at all. You ALLOWED YOURSELF TO BE VULNERABLE AND WILD AND OPEN AND FREE. You hoped that he or she or they were the one(s). If not, he or she or they are the prototype(s). Say thank you because you are stronger because of it. This is not the end. It may feel like it is, but it is not. This is only the end of a chapter, you just have to turn the next page.

Below, you will find my first music video “Entity.” Remember to always STAY TUNED and STAY TRUE.


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